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At that moment, when the world around him melted away, when he stood alone like a star in the heavens

he was overwhelmed by a feeling of icy despair, but he was more firmly himself than ever.

Got some unsavory news today regarding Deadroom. It's a pretty complex story so calling it bad news is a bit of a misnomer. It in no way, shape or form does any harm to the film it just isn't what we wanted to hear at this point. As a matter of fact, it's probably done a great deal of good for the project, just not in the extent that we wished for. Who are we to complain though. I'm not purposefully being cryptic, it's just kind of a long story involving Sundance, Hollywood agents, and the hopes and dreams of four lowly Texas filmmakers. There are lots of details involved that I don't want to get into right now. No matter what we've still got a great film. It's a shame that every little thing has to be so hard when it comes to something so simple. Eh, anyway, I'll keep plugging away.

I've started a new script with David and I'm sure it will be great once it's done. We're writing every Tuesday now and hope to take a week in January to lock our selves away in New Mexico to finish it up. We'll see.
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The Suspense is Killing Me

I haven't had this many butterflies in my stomach since I fell in love with Amy.
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Jim Jarmusch is My Fucking Hero

Read this article and you'll know why. Ignore all the stupid shit the reporter is saying and just pay attention to what Jarmusch and the people who know him say.

Another goddamn genius is David Gordon Green. The pitch for his latest film Undertow was this: "It's the episode of Dukes of Hazzard that David Lynch never got to direct." Undertow is amazing and inspiring. Green has got his style and vision refined to a point of mastery. I can't wait to see where he takes his next project.

Deadroom is in a vicious cycle of waiting. Big news or crushing news? December will tell all. Hope is the brightest it's ever been. Even David's caught on to it. If anybody deserves something special to come of all this it's David and Yen especially. They've worked hard on this craft. They write and think and practice and consistently come up with true art. They've both got something amazing behind those eyes and I would give anything to be in the same league as them. They give their heart and soul to the game like no one else I know. I wish them luck and I hope they allow me to ride their coattails when the time comes.
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god's silence

Have you ever seen Winter Light? It's really goddamn good. Maybe it's the times but the philosophical nature and questioning the validity of faith in such a cruel world really hit home. Granted, I'm pretty fucking far from being a man of faith. I have trouble believing in a human standing directly in front of me much less some invisible, omnipresent being that no one will ever see, except through their own self-inflicted delusions of faith. Even with my lack of faith in religion this film still holds a lot of truths because faith is faith no matter where you place it. Right now I find myself in a crisis of faith with humanity. I've always lived under the belief that humans are basically good. They mean well and the world will continue to get better, etc. Lately, I haven't been feeling so optimistic about all that. And no, this isn't just a reaction to Bush getting reelected. That definitely provides one more case study for the ineptitude of humans, but isn't an all in all deciding factor on humanity.

I always fancied the idea of using my artistic endeavors to gain leverage in a progressive way. Do something to make a difference and make the world better. Lately, I've been wondering why I should bother. Maybe I should just make the films I want to make, have fun and enjoy my life while I can. Make sure the ones I love are safe and happy with me and forget about helping everyone else. They should be able to help their damn selves.

It's tempting but for some reason I just can't stop caring and that's why it pains me to see the negative aspects of humanity so far outweigh the positive ones. It seems that it's always been the same way. I have a wonderful life and I'm very happy with my own existence but there are so many people in horrible situations purely because of the evil of other humans and partly because of their own stupidity. Obviously there are more questions than answers and this is probably something that will plague me for my whole life. I want to do something but damn...there is so much injustice and I have to live with the fact that there are more people out there who would be willing to do me harm for their own gain than would be willing to help me out for no reward.
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My Sentiments Exactly